What's in a name....

Chunky Salsa?? Why?? Why not!!??

A few years ago I had a revelation (or at least that's what I thought!) and I am forever dedicated to making Chunky Salsa a reality.

Here's the story:

I am always dealing with up and downs with my weight, mostly ups, which is just another thing I have learned to embrace.  At the point in my life that said "revelation" happened, I was looking for a new way for the "downs".  This was about the time that Kirstie Alley was on her Jenny Craig kick, and she was on a talk show talking, imagine that, about how she was losing weight. She said one of the ways that she worked in some activity during her busy days was by cleaning her house in high heels listening to crazy music and throwing in a few dance moves between the dust bunnies and dishes. What a novel idea, right?? My neighbors would never think that I was crazy if "It's Raining Men" or "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" was blaring from my house in the middle of the day, whilst they can see me through my windows doing my best impression of the lawn mower and the sprinkler in a pair of Jimmy Choo knockoffs, while simultaneously folding laundry. No white jacket for me, thank you very much!!!

So, I thought and thought, and thought some more about what I could do with my new found knowledge.  And it hit me!!! I would open a fitness/dance studio and offer classes in different types of dance, yoga, maybe some pilates and we would do it all in high heels....how much fun would that be!!??  But here is my problem, I have never found the skinny girls at the gym anything more than some eye candy for the boys pretending to lift weights. (The skinny girls I refer to so lovingly are the ones that wear full make up, boufant hair, and the shortest booty shorts they could find that morning, complimented by a sports bra....and huge hoop earrings...you know exactly what I am talking about. While I am on the stairmaster sweating my fat ass off in cut off sweat pants and a hand me down tee shirt from my husband, with what is left from the day's makeup making me look like a stand in in an Alice Cooper music video - this is the type of thing that I DO NOT want to be looking at.) So the studio had to be a "Barbie Free Zone", Skippers only! But how does one accomplish this with out stepping on dainty, little, perfectly painted toes???

It's all in the name girls, all in the name. The name of my studio would be "Chunky Salsa".

One day my dream will come to fruition....one of these days.....

It's what all the cool kids are doing.....

So here I am, blogging....what a nerd. I have been thinking about starting a blog for a while, with no real target audience in mind, or subject matter really - maybe, just maybe, I can make someone giggle (under your breath if you are at work reading this), or think about things in a different way.

I am not really an "interesting" person, I haven't been around the world (unfortunately), I am not blogging about my recent missionary work (yet), I am just a girl with some opinions and thoughts that I feel like maybe someone out there could relate with.

To start with - who am I?? Who AM I? I am an aunt to some wonderful kiddos, I am a sister to two great men (who couldn't be more opposite!) and their wonderful wives, I am a wife, I am who I am, I am a daughter to two amazing (and also very opposite) parents. I am a 20 something year old college drop out with a real estate license that I don't currently use. I am married to a wonderful man who is absolutely my best friend, and above all else he puts up with what we refer to as "my craziness". It drives me insane when women go on and on and on and on about what a wonderful husband they have....it makes me a bit skeptical....I on the other hand will tell you that I am OCD beyond belief and we fight about my tics at least once a week, or how he loaded the dishwasher, or how he replaced the trash bag in the trash can, or how the sheets are wrong on the bed, if the door is locked, if the iron is unplugged, or how he folded a towel .....So you see, I have a WONDERFUL husband, who puts up with that craziness. My husband and I have two wonderful English Bulldogs, that serve as our perpetual couch fixtures. I am a big girl, I am not gonna lie, and plus sized clothing just pisses me off, we'll get into that later! I paint and decorate guitars when I have time off. And I love to get out in the yard and pretend like I know what I am doing with landscaping and taking care of it. I grew up 30 miles from nowhere, literally, in south central Texas. So...I am a country girl, and I talk funny, and I dress funny, and I EMBRACE it all!

My life has been a good life so far, no real complaints.....you know we all have dysfunctional families, some more than others, and in my case we definitely feed off of each others dysfunction, and occasionally get pretty ruthless. But it keeps life interesting.

I am currently a church secretary at an Episcopal Church, I love my job. I LOVE my job. I am not the evangelical, witnessing type so I won't get into all of the gooey stuff about how my job affects my spiritual life, but I will tell you that it is awesome. The people I work with are incredible, and having a priest for a boss (a priest with a fantastic sense of humor) is another reason I love my job. I grew up in the Episcopal church and after a brief hiatus in college (read: drinking!), and a four year BUSY career as a Realtor, a job ad in the local newspaper caught my eye. The local Episcopal church needed a secretary! It was time for a break in my young life and also a spiritual renewal of sorts. A month after applying for the job I accepted the postion of "Church Lady". I worked there for a year, moved away for 10 months because of my husband's job (that was supposed to be a three year contract) and then moved back and praise God, the job was open again. I have been back in my seat as church lady for the last 5 months and love it.

I guess you could say that appearances can be deceiving....I hate slacks, I wear jeans or khakis to work as much as I can, I have a pierced nose (which I take out for work), a couple of tattoos that I keep under wraps as per the dress code here, and of course I am currently 24. The median age for most church secretaries is at least 60....as many are retirees looking for some "light" work. I must say that I stay pretty busy at my job, especially during Lent, Advent, Epiphany, and the Easter season. Occasionally I come up for air, and am thankful for the blessings that I have.

Ok...enough gooey. Lets get right down to it..... You can love this blog or hate it, but be nice about your comments (if anyone bothers to read it) there is no point in being mean, because NICE MATTERS! I want opinions and feedback, but I am not, and will not pretend to be, interested in arguing with anyone about my opinions.

A lot of what has been going through this crazy head of mine is....um....interesting, and I think this may be the perfect outlet. I will surely embarrass my family....but why not, I am the Plaid Sheep of my family after all. Stay tuned!